May I recommend
A mid-sized cockapoo.
These are the platonic ideal for dog, size-wise. Not so small that you need to worry about stepping on them, not so large that you need to fear shoulder dislocation when you walk them.
A mid-sized cockapoo is a happy dog, with a waggedy tail and a forceful, burglar-deterring bark.
A mid-sized cockapoo can come in many colours, including white, dark or light brown, black or a jumble of all the colours. One caution against the white, it does mean that snoutly whiskers end up black and kind of dirty quite quickly. Regular grooming of your mid-sized cockapoo is a must, lest they start to look like a matted filth monster.
Mid-sized cockapoos have surprising leaping capabilities, and assuming that your backyard retaining wall is high enough to retain them is a foolish mistake that I advise against.
Mid-sized cockapoos are quite interested in catching and eating squirrels and bunnies. Mid-sized cockapoos are quite ineffective at catching and eating squirrels and bunnies. Mid-sized cockapoos do not know what to do when they are in proximity to a cat, apart from completely losing their shit. Will your mid-sized cockapoo want to befriend the cat or eat the cat? Impossible to determine, and best not try and find out.
Do you have a mid-sized cockapoo? If not, why not? Explain yourself in the comments below.
Gross, fascinating and weirdly comforting
I once attempted to write a Harlequin Romance set in medieval Iceland… It did not go well. In any event, I did a lot of reading about that part of the world, so I’m always down for some Greenland-Iceland-Viking content.
Really, every line of this article is interesting. There is a lot of comfort in its intro… This too shall pass.
In 1606 a devastating pestilence swept through London; the dying were boarded up in their homes with their families, and a decree went out that the theatres, the bear-baiting yards and the brothels be closed. It was then that Shakespeare wrote one of his very few references to the plague, catching at our precarity: ‘The dead man’s knell/Is there scarce asked for who, and good men’s lives/Expire before the flowers in their caps/Dying or ere they sicken.’ As he wrote, a Greenland shark who is still alive today swam untroubled through the waters of the northern seas. Its parents would have been old enough to have lived alongside Dante; its great-great-grandparents alongside Julius Caesar. For thousands of years Greenland sharks have swum in silence, as above them the world has burned, rebuilt, burned again.
I saw Jonathan Torrens in a Halifax Roots, once
I did.
From Trailer Park Boys to Pandemic therapist: Jonathan Torrens will see you now
Like any right thinking mid-Gen-X Canadian hetero girl, I had a mild crush on Jonathan Torrens in his Street Cents heyday.
This article filled me with further love for this (in his own words) middling Canadian celebrity. I’m also now following his feel-good Twitter account.
This brand of sappiness is right in my wheelhouse at the moment.
“My dad died when I was 8,” he wrote. “Every week a few of the dads on my hockey team would offer to tie my skates. Not in a big showy way, in a quiet kind way. They filled the gap.”
Then, as he does, Torrens distilled the story into a message: “Find a way to fill the gap for someone,” he wrote. “It’ll make you both better.”
Look after your plants
The easy 0$ houseplant care trick that even experienced house plant lovers forget to do
I am getting more and more into houseplants, but I am not good at it. This seems do-able. I can poke holes in stuff
First, grab one of those displaced chopsticks or something the same size, such as a number 2 pencil. Poke the stick gently down into the soil, as deep as you can go. Repeat multiple times all over the surface area of the soil. You might hear the stick push through and snap a few of the roots, but that’s okay — they’ll grow back stronger. Don’t be afraid to apply some pressure to get through to the bottom of the pot.
Done
Oh my God, THIS SONG and THIS VIDEO. My friend Amy hooked me up with this one. I probably watch this video once a month. The attitude! The clothes! The neighbourhood! Everyone’s wonderful round, fullsome bodies!
TikTok
Today’s theme is good dogs
Ramp Season
It’s the “you’re an idiot” that sells it
Pure wizardry - if you understand how this works, please explain it to me in the comments
Ha ha
Bite your lip
A bad dog
Expressing how we would all feel
It’s already playing, just watch it
I’m not particularly hot for JT, but this made me laugh. Also enjoy the fact that he waited around to get the slightly not as good AstraZeneca with the rest of us.
If you trash talk, you’ve got to have the goods to back it up
AMY TECTOR - THE HONEYBEE EMERALDS (MARCH 2022)
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Mid-sized Cockapoos + the Greenland Shark + Jonathan Torrens
Thank you for reminding me of our old dog, who - despite having a stiff back, being a little bit overweight and in general not built for athletics - thought she was the Goddess of All Hunters whenever she saw a squirrel. Seems she might not be the only one!
Sounds like you've also just described the Nova Scotia Duck Tolling Retriever, right down to the spring-loaded limbs! No concerns about a dirty muzzle, but it's amazing how many red hair bunnies appear daily. (Especially when you are living with two human redheads too!)