Bib Snowpants + Arctic weather + puzzles
May I recommend
Bib Snowpants
The snow, the snow, the glorious snow has arrived. Huzzah! With it comes the eternal question — what ski pants can I wear? If you are shortish and roundish like me, this is a tricky one because ski pants DON’T KNOW ABOUT LYCRA OR SPANDEX.
That’s right my good coconuts, they have a hard waistband. I think we can all agree that hard waistbands, like doctors endorsing cigarettes, CD binders and witch trials are OVER.
What is a girl (middle aged woman) to do? I have searched high and I have searched low… Either the ski pant is too tight and I can’t zip it up without foregoing a future where I can bend or breathe, or the ski pant is too long and my feet (even in ski boots… even in skis!) completely disappear.
At this point you might be thinking, Amy what do you even NEED ski pants for? You grew up in the Eastern Townships in the 1980s — wear those jeans on the slopes, girl! While I do respect a Jeans Skier as much as the next gal, I am old, I am shiversome and I need insulation… Maybe Jeans Skiing is OK in Europe, where I have literally seen people zip down the slopes whilst smoking, but here in the North East where the hills are basically made of ice, the wind is filled with glass shards and the sun is a hazy blob somehow sucking heat IN, one needs a thick pair of warm pants to keep one’s ass from freezing off.
All this to say I have discovered the solution: the bibbed snowpant! Return to your childhood of getting all dressed, stepping outside and then racing back inside to strip off all you clothes in order to pee!
Bibbed snowpants allow your sweet stomach to live its best life, unpinched and uncinched by devilish waistbands. Also, they are WARMER because they go right up over your torso and retain more heat (or something, I am not a scientist).
The best, best part is that you don’t need fancy 600 dollar ones… Mine are either from Canadian Tire or Amazon (ugh) and they were under $100. I have skied down a variety of angry icy North Eastern mountains in them whilst being buffeted by minus 40 winds and they have kept me as warm as anything can in those objectively ridiculous conditions.
Tell me about your snowpants in the comments below!
How to dress for winter weather
How to dress for the cold weather, as explained by an Arctic Researcher
Okay, I thought I was kind of an expert in winter weather dressing (see above) but I learned many useful things in this article… I didn’t know about the baseball hat thing, and the bit about the sunscreen on your nostrils is also a good takeaway.
Your first warning that you’re getting too cold is how your fingers and toes feel, since they’re the farthest from your heart. “When I was taking students out on the ice, that’s the first thing I’d ask: ‘How’s everybody’s fingers and toes? All 10? All 20?’ I wanted them to feel that they can count all 20 digits because they’re your remote sensors.”
My key advice to anyone is silk/synthetic long johns always all the time and a hood. A hood is key.
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Puzzles
27 Puzzles to help you feel relaxed and cozy this winter
Listen, I hate puzzling with the heat of a thousand burning suns, but every person I love adores puzzles, and I feel like my newsletter demographic is into these impossible, visually draining, boring, fiddly, story-less snooze fests, so here you go.
Some of these DO look quite pretty - I like the disco ball in the one below.
This vibrant jigsaw puzzle for adults comes in a variety of different sizes and intensity levels, depending on the challenge you’re looking for.
Something for the word nerds
Twenty-Five words that are their own opposites
Contranyms are words that contain their own opposites — sort of like how each Shakespearean hero’s tragic flaw contributes to his own demise (Boom! English Degree Deployed).
Seed can also go either way. If you seed the lawn you add seeds, but if you seed a tomato you remove them.
Book Stuff
Guys! Want a signed Advance Reader Copy of Speak for the Dead? I’ll be giving away TWO of these bad boys to you, my loyal newsletter readers. All you have to do is fill in this form. Only Méli-Mélo readers are eligible to join, so you’ve got a good chance of winning!
Get early access to this fast-moving novel set in the Dominion Archives and featuring a new protagonist - cantankerous coroner Dr. Cate Spencer! This one takes place in a nitrate film vault - nitrate is weirdly interesting — it is unstable and can literally spontaneously combust. I came up with the idea years ago when I was involved in moving Canada’s national collection of nitrate photo negatives from a creepy disused building on an abandoned air force base. My first thought when I entered the building was — oo, this would make a good setting for MURDER.
The best part about the contest? If you want bonus entries, you can “like” my (still quite pathetic) professional author Facebook page, or follow me on Instagram or mark Speak as “To be Read” on Goodreads — all will earn you more entries and increase your chance of winning. I’ll do the draw New Years Eve, so you’ve got two weeks to get your entries in and I will send you a bonus post as a reminder to everyone in that wonderful, cheese and Turtles-filled haze between Christmas and New Years.
Buy my books!
TikTok
As a very near sighted person, this hits hard
Love these two
Have to 100% agree with the caption on this one
Mostly I just love Les Mis
This nerdery made me laugh
I find this lady very funny in everything she does
I have made this mistake, so I feel for this dorks
Oh this show! The clothes, the hair, the Les Nessman!
Auxillary Percussion
Love the train
This one made my daughter GASP
I love this guy
Ever seen a ledge this clean?
This lady is very brave and cool
Oh My God, I will always link to North and South content (if you haven’t watched it, do yourself a favour this holiday season - so SATISFYING)
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