May I recommend
Spotting a fox in the wild. This happened to me on Friday. It was incredible, as evidence by my poetic and awed response at the start of this very short clip. (apologies for the TikTok of it all, apparently Substack doesn’t let you upload videos)
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I know I usually dazzle you with an incredible, more detailed recommendation (did anyone try putting an elastic around their phone or buying a face mist?) but it’s been a tough week for a couple of reasons, so in the sprit of Canadian Thanksgiving which is this Sunday (or is it actually Monday?) I’m just going to say that I’m very grateful for you, my lovely and growing newsletter community.
This tweet sums up the holiday’s enjoyability.
In addition to the above, this is truly the best time of the year in my neck of the woods, because the maples and birches and oaks are SPECTACULAR and a crisp autumnal day is worth its weight in flannel shirts and pumpkin spice lattes. Get out there and enjoy it, and remember to keep your eyes peeled for foxes - there is wonder out there!
Parrot snatching
Why is Everyone Stealing Parrots?
This is the deep dive into parrot thievery you didn’t know you needed. Fascinating and deeply weird.
My Google Alert for stolen parrot, which I set up in the early 2010s, has delivered a long and steady run of colorful reports: small-time parrot robberies and major parrot heists; planned-out parrot capers and cage-smash parrot grabs; parrot thefts of passion, parrot thefts of vengeance, and parrot thefts of odd compulsion. After a decade’s worth of monitoring this feed, I can confirm that parrot-napping is indeed a common crime throughout the English-speaking world. In fact, it’s a weirdly common crime—and also, commonly, a weird one.
Line up some laughs for a long winter…
70 Best Comedies of the 21st Century
These roundups are like cat-nip to me and there are a couple of movies in the Top Ten I’ve never even heard of, so they’re going on my list. I have to say, I do quite like their Number one…
Anchorman was rated Number 13:
In Ron Burgundy, Ferrell and his frequent collaborator/director/co-writer Adam
McKay found the perfect delivery device for the actor’s hilarious sendup of
alpha-male privilege, playing the buffoonish, sexist San Diego newscaster whose
cocksure reign is about to be punctured. It helped also established Ferrell’s brilliant non-sequitur oddness: How a bull session about
love segues inexplicably into an impromptu a
cappella performance of “Afternoon Delight,” or how a rivalry with other news crews effortlessly turns into a Warriors-style street brawl. And it’s quotable as hell, from Burgundy’s declaration that San Diego is German for “a whale’s vagina” to his insistence that he’s “in a glass case of emotion.” In the not-too-distant future, we’ll all be speaking in Burgundy-isms.
The Jig is Up
Irish Dancing Rocked by Major Allegations of Competition Fixing
Full disclosure, I stole this clever title from some wag on Twitter. But come on, it’s criminal not to use it, right?
It is understood that screenshots of text conversations showing 12 Irish dance teachers either asking for, or offering to, fix competitions were handed over to the CLRG in July.
Separately the Irish Independent has seen more screenshots, which have not yet been shared with the CLRG, which appear to implicate at least another six teachers.
Book News
Knowlton Literary Festival Saturday October 22, 3:30-4:30pm: Very, very VERY excited to announce that I will be in conversation with Louise Penny. Hold onto your hats, because in a very weird turn of events, Louise Penny will be asking ME questions rather than the reverse. I am so looking forward to chatting with this author whose writing and career I admire! Come on out, it would be wonderful to see you!
In Conversation with Bianca Marais November 22, 6:30 pm. Perfect Books, Ottawa. Bianca hosts the incredible podcast, The Shit No One Tells You About Writing, which if you are even the teeniest bit interested in writing as a hobby/career is a MUST LISTEN. She’s a great writer and her latest book, The Witches of Moonshyne Manor is about a coven of modern day witches and is a cross between Golden Girls and Practical Magic. She and I are going to chat about her book, her podcast and how she finds the time to do it all. I can’t wait. This is free, so if you’re in Ottawa, MARK YOUR CALENDARS.
Maple Leaf Leaf OttawaMystery Conference December 3, 2022. This is a virtual mini-conference featuring Ottawa-based mystery authors, but it’s open to the WORLD. Early-bird registration is only $15 and I’m very excited to be moderating a panel on cozy mysteries. I have never been in CHARGE before and am planning to go mad with power. The registration isn’t open yet, but if you want more details you can email MapleLeafMysteryConference@gmail.com
Past events
Perfect Books Book Launch: It was a truly great launch and I was so touched to see friends, family and even fans(!) show up. I fulfilled a lifelong dream and had a book cake. It was delicious.
Noir at the Bar Toronto was a ton of fun. I met some wonderful authors, heard some great readings, ate a surprisingly good Cobb Salad and encourage you all to go out to the next one — it’s a good night!
New author photo, taken by the supremely talented MeghanHallphotography. Guys, she just snapped this with her iPhone in about 8 seconds. The lady is a wizard.
Buy The Foulest Things here and grab The Honeybee Emeralds here!
TikTok
Embarrassing things
Spon and Fook
At least I’m not camping
The rollover
That’s some hearing
So focussed
Okay, very fascinating
Is there any way this is real?
Loved the Lizzo and the Crystal Flute story
It IS ironic
So much dog content
I KNOW it’s cheesy, but I also know I sobbed
Thanks for reading my bi-monthly newsletter.
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Fox and Geese! A classic run-and-catch game played as a child in the snow! Remember?
Gah! You're talking with Louise Penny! Please tell Louise we love her. And Bianca Marais (who is lovely. She chatted with book club years ago).